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What happens when you take a baby to museums


Note: I know babies don’t need ‘culture’. They aren’t interested in great works or art or historically significant objects. This is about what I need, and what I need is a warm, dry place where I can entertain the Popple while one of this winter’s many storms with a name does its best to make outdoor activities f***ing impossible.

First stop: The Kelvingrove Art Gallery and Museum

Cultural highlights: Salvador Dali’s Christ of St John on the Cross, the coffin and mummy of Ankhesnefer in the Egyptian gallery, Sophie Cave’s floating head statues in the foyer.

The Popple’s highlights: A display that might have been about fish migration or something. I’m not sure. It had a lever that I could pull to make some metal fish jump, which I did – over and over and over – while the Popple kicked her feet, mesmerised.

The bench outside the basement toilets, apparently the ideal place to take off your socks and throw them on the floor repeatedly. Also good for licking purposes.

Second stop: The Burrell Collection

Cultural highlights: Collection of Degas paintings, Rodin’s ‘The Thinker’, a 13th-century stained glass panel.

The Popple’s highlights: The museum cafe, where she sat in a filthy highchair and happily threw most of her homemade savoury flapjacks on the floor.

The bench outside the gift shop, where she could chew on Grandma’s glasses to her heart’s content.


Third stop: The Riverside Museum

Cultural highlights: The world’s oldest bicycle, the world’s second oldest Rolls Royce, a FABULOUS platform shoe that Elton John wore onstage once.

The Popple’s highlights: The touch screens scattered around the museum where you can swipe to find out more information about the collections.

“It’s like the iPad!” I said to her excitedly. She loves the iPad. We use mine to Skype with my mom, and she spends most of the call trying to lick the screen and hanging up on her.

A bench with a view of the Tall Ship, where she played the let’s-see-how-many-times-I-can-deliberately-drop-my-teething-ring-before-Mommy-stops-picking-it-up game.

11 thoughts on “What happens when you take a baby to museums”

  • I took Piglet to the London Aquarium when he was 11 months old, on the basis that we were moving out of London soon, and he was too young to enjoy any of the other museums yet. I ended up lugging him around in one hand and pushing the buggy in the other (he was too big for the sling by this point) and I was absolutely knackered. I have now decided that the first rule of museums with a baby/toddler is: take a companion. #fartglitter

    • I agree! I went to all these museums with my mum – I wore the Popple in the carrier while my mum pushed the pram, and then we put the Popple in the pram when she was ready for nap. A two-person job for sure!

  • Lots of culture going on here. Absolutely no chance of getting my son in a museum as it’s B-O-R-I-N-G (his words) unless it was full of owls and then he’d never leave. Lovely post. 🙂 #ABitOfEverything

  • She sounds like she had fun! Wait until she starts talking and asking very random questions about the naked Greek statutes at the top of her voice like my 2 year old did!

  • I love museums, but my ‘child’ the 44 year old Mr AD is less keen. I think you did really well to get round three with no baby incidents.
    Thanks for sharing with us, Tracey xx #abitofeverything
    P.s I just love your blog name xx

  • Popple is officially the most cultured baby at #coolmumclub! I once went to the Glasgow museum of transport as a kid… That’s one to add to your rainy day adventures!
    Thanks for sharing with #coolmumclub

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