In order to be considered for the role, you must:
- Live in the Glasgow area* and have a baby under one year old.
- Be willing to listen to me talk about the Popple’s poo/eczema/drool rashes in explicit detail. (I will, of course, listen to you talk about your baby’s gross stuff too.)
- Not be offended if I make plans to meet for coffee and only stay for five minutes because the Popple has decided she hates the cafe/needs a nap/both.
- Be able to meet up before 5pm, also known as grizzle o’clock.
- Not be one of those judgy parents. We’re all doing the best we can, so let’s be supportive rather than looking down on mums who are doing things a little differently, amiright?
More about this role:
Look, I’m not good at meeting new people. I’ve gone to great lengths to avoid talking to strangers in the past, including purposefully booking a hotel on the opposite side of London from everyone else at a conference so I’d have an excuse to skip the formal dinner and eat an M&S salad alone in my hotel room. But I’d rather go on a dozen awkward mum dates than go through this whole motherhood thing alone. It’s HARD. And it can be lonely.
So are you genuinely interested in the ins and outs of baby-led weaning? Are you eager to compare nappy brands and discuss the wonders of Sudocrem? Have you bored all your non-mum friends with your stories about Calpol spillages and nighttime feedings?
Me too. Let’s be boring together.
* Though mums from further afield are welcome to apply if they’re really awesome, since the internet makes connecting with each other stupidly easy. Hello, mums of the interweb!