Why I didn’t do a Beyoncé-style pregnancy announcement

Couple each holding a baby shoe in one hand

So everyone has been going nuts over Beyoncé’s pregnancy announcement photo.

You know, the one where she’s kneeling amongst a bunch of flowers while wearing silky pants with a piece of green tulle draped over her head.

Beyonce's pregnancy photoshoot

As you do.

She looks great, of course. Totally weird, but great. She’s Beyoncé – of course she looks gorgeous even with a giant belly full of babies.

Clearly, I’m no Bey. My pregnancy photos looked more like this.

Me at 37 weeks pregnant standing outside

Rather than exuding glamour, I exuded fatness and frustration. I was wearing this dress in almost all of my pregnancy photos, the most boring and unflattering maternity dress that I could find. I grew weirdly attached to it and even tried to wear it post-baby, but it just kind of hung like a sack around the middle where my ginormous belly had been.

There seems to be a trend for announcing your pregnancy in cute, socially-sharable ways these days. Couples post photos of their feet next to tiny pairs of baby shoes, or share a photo of an actual bun in an actual oven, or put their older child in a shirt that says ‘Big Brother’ on it. Cue likes, comments, Facebook ‘wow’ faces, etc.

And that’s cool, if you’re into that. A pregnancy is a big deal, and you want to share the news with your family, friends and that girl who sat next to you in biology class in high school. I get it.

But I still couldn’t do it.

I never made any sort of public pregnancy announcement. I told close friends and family, obviously, and colleagues too once my fatness demanded an explanation, but I never put anything out on social media. Most of my friends had no idea that I was even pregnant until my husband posted a photo of our daughter on Facebook a few days after she was born.

There’s a good reason for that: I was terrified.

Some people claim that they loved being pregnant. I don’t understand those people. For me, pregnancy was nine solid months of straight-up anxiety. What if something happens to the baby? What if I eat the wrong thing or move the wrong way? Is this twinge in my abdomen normal? Is she moving enough? It wasn’t something I felt like sharing with my entire social circle.

“Ooh, congratulations! You must be so excited!” they would have said. And I would have had to stop myself from responding with, “Excited? Are you kidding me? I’m shitting myself over here.”

Maybe Bey is shitting herself too (and who could blame her – she’s having twins, FFS), but she’s just hiding it really well. Maybe all those mothers who post those cute pictures of little baby shoes are also shitting themselves. After all, social media is a great place to say, “We are incredible grateful that our family will be growing,” and not such a great place to say, “I’m totally freaking out about the fact that I’m about to become responsible for a very small and vulnerable human being.”

Maybe it’s time for that to change.

Diary of An Imperfect Mum
My Petit Canard
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24 Comment

  1. I think you look great in your pregnancy photo, but I do also think people overshare on social media a lot. I think it’s all about individual comfort zones and I’m glad you didn’t push yourself to put more out onto social media than you were happy with. #EatSleepBlogRT

  2. Sarah - mud cakes and wine says: Reply

    Bey does look amazing but I also found it a tad odd. Though I love your dress, we announced on Facebook mainly as I like a drink and pretty sure everyone had already guessed as I stopped drinking 😂😂 #eatsleepblogrt

  3. A great post! Beyonces pic was a bit weird and that’s coming from me, who worships the woman! I for one think you looked great with bump! xx #marvmondays

  4. You look amazing in that pregnancy photo and totally understand how you grew very fond of your dress when pregnant and after. I had this with a pair of jeans and kept wearing them for ages after having a baby. They were just so comfy! I too didn’t put myself out there on social media but I was not a glam pregnant lady like B, I was a very grumpy and spotty one! #MarvMondays

  5. Oh that photo of you is fab and I can’t believe it didn’t go viral – your own kind of Bey for sure! I was pregnant pre social media – I know that sounds dramatic and ancient but I was! I’m almost laughing myself now – how much has changed in that time – only 17 years but just ridiculous that social media has become a totally acceptable place to tell everyone your most personal news. I wonder how I would have approached it if social media was around then – I’m, despite being a blogger, quite a private person so I’m guessing I wouldn’t have shouted it about too much but who knows! #MarvMondays

  6. haha … love this. I had a dress very similar to yours and it’s one of few I would permit photos of me taken in as I too was massive!
    I do wander how much airbrushing was done on Beyonce’s photo though. It’s totally wierd and unnatural. I really don’t get it, as beautiful as she is.
    #MarvMondays

  7. I’m totally with you and although I’ve seen some gorgeous baby reveals and gender reveals I like to keep things fairly quiet too. I was massively worried after Oliver, my second baby was born at 25 weeks and after we later lost him, it was hard to be excited about being pregnant again. It seems some celebrities almost pop babies out for publicity and great big elaborate pregnancy reveals and OK features! Thanks for joining us for #marvmondays

  8. I did post a picture on social media – I was just so excited I wanted to shout it from the rooftops (although I was absolutely terrified!) The picture was of shoes though, not me – I was constantly exhausted and looked rubbish.
    I don’t know what it is about it, but Beyonce’s picture just really annoyed me. Don’t get me wrong, she looks great, it’s just so…weird. #BigPinkLink

  9. I love Queen Bey- but she could have done better.

    I dont get the whole scene.

    #marvmondays

  10. Each to their own but that Bey photo is just odd. I’ll tell you one thing, I wish I’d looked half as good as you when I was pregnant! We never did any great big announcement, we’d already leaned the hard way that sometimes things don’t work out so didn’t really tell anyone, just our parents and then they kind of spread the news after that.
    #MarvMondays

  11. I know exactly what you mean especially with my youngest as we had to have loads of extra scans etc because they thought he had a heart problem. I spent my entire pregnancy stressing, it was awful. I do love the reveals I just wish I could have had one too. Thank you for linking up to #EatSleepBlogRT 🌟

  12. We didn’t use social media to make the announcement, it was never something that appealed to us. #marvmondays

  13. I adore Queen Bey, like she is my Queen but when I went on insta last Wednesday and saw that photo I didn’t like it. Not that she would give a damn but I just hated the backdrop, the clothes, the weird green net curtain over her head; the lot. I just thought it was a bit try hard.
    I was so boring with my pregnancy announcement, I injected a bit of my own humour into it but there was no photos or anything. Times have changed a bit in recent years I think.
    Great post.
    #dreamteam

  14. I totally get where you are coming from. We didn’t announce it on social media either, although it became obvious when a picture of me at a wedding with a huge belly was posted! I just didn’t feel the need to share it.

  15. We had our little ones before the craze for perfectly planned pregnancy announcements hit, but we did post the news to social media once we’d passed the 1st trimester stage. I’m with you, though – when I was expecting my 1st child, I found it really hard to see past the fear and how much my life would change forever.

    But happily, it turns out I didn’t need to worry – whilst I could imagine the hardship and the fear, I could never have imagined the love and wonder and warmth that comes from being a Mummy 🙂 #DreamTeam

  16. Glad to hear it wasn’t just me that thought Beyonces photos were a bit ermmmm out there. We didn’t do announcements either, but I do love seeing them from other people. I think it comes down to what you feel comfortable with at the time. Pregnancy is a funny thing. Thank you for sharing with the #DreamTeam lovely. Your photo is gorgeous xx

  17. Beyoncé’s pic is totally wackadoo. #awkwardfamilyphotos. On the other hand, your pic looks like a completely normal pregnancy pic. You look like you are thinking “Go ahead, take one more picture. I dare you.” Social media is a place where people show the highlights of thier life and hope that everyone else thinks that it’s amazing. I post my highlights when I want, but I hate coming across as this put-together person that clearly I am not.

  18. I don’t understand Beyonce’s picture at all! That said, we did make an ‘announcement’ on social media with baby number two and three… #marvmondays

  19. I was exactly like you. I was so scared something would happen that I didn’t want people to know. I didn’t want any fuss or drama either. We never announced her arrival on social media. But I enjoy those that do share. It’s just not me!

    Also I think that’s a lovely photo of you pregnant. Your bemused expression is wonderful! #MarvMondays #DreamTeam

  20. Social media has definitely made everyone much less private – and I think your picture is lovely 🙂

    #familyfun

  21. I think you look great in that photo! We didn’t do a big announcement either, not one for all the attention! And I’m probably a bit miserable! Someone we know did a cute announcement, but then made us sit and spot out all the baby clues hidden in the photo. Which to me seemed overkill! I know they were excited and we were excited for them, but we don’t have to sit and stare at the announcement for 15mins! See I’m miserable! Haha! #familyfun

  22. Ha I didn’t actually realise she was having twins. Yours is he first article I have read on said announcement. Only because the picture said it all – or so I thought. It is a weird picture though right? Yeah we didn’t do announcements either, hmm well def not with Toby anyway. I don’t think people knew until baby photos started appearing on social media. But hey, each to their own… ps. Pregnancy was a total anxiety fest for me too and you looked fab! Thanks for joining us at #familyfun

  23. Awww you look fab in your pregnancy photo. Beyonces picture was a bit too weird for me. Yeah she looks good, but it’s weird. I totally get where you are coming from with the dress because I had one I lived in and I really wanted to wear it afterwards too. I’ve still got it actually and look at it every now and again and wonder if I should wear it before putting it back again. Haha.
    #FamilyFunLinky

  24. Im the same, I wouldn’t say I was axious about being preggers but I didn’t announce that I had Robert until he was probaly 6 months old! Facebook didn’t need to know! lol. #Familyfun

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